I Just Want to Complain, But I Won't...

Sometimes.  Really, sometimes I just want to whine and complain about how tough this mom gig really is and how exhausted I am every single day.  Then I remember that I chose this.  I remember that I haven't had a corporate job that I actually enjoyed in I don't even know how long and that I really am exactly where I want to be.  We all still have tough days - corporate, mom taxi or otherwise.  That being said, I thought it would be a little bit funny if I reworded my complaints into things that I'm thankful for.  Because, at the end of the day, all we really want are healthy, happy and well rounded kids, right?

1. I'm thankful that you love the water - maybe you'll be a swimmer some day.  I must tell you, though, I don't think that playing in the dog water OR the toilet will get you there.  But please, discover.

2. I'm thankful for your refined palette and your desire to put absolutely anything and everything in your mouth.  It's not always the food I cook for you - but everything else goes in there with such zeal and excitement that maybe you're destined to be a food critic, or in the very least, a good cook like your dad, which is better than what I can do, at least at the moment. 

3. I love that you have a strong throwing arm, tossing toys (and food) this way and that.  That's all.  You're very good at throwing things.

4. I'm glad that you value clean dishes and want to know exactly how the dishwasher works - by either removing all dishes and silverware (see #3) or by simply climbing inside to get a better look.

5. You must value leftovers since you rearrange the Tupperware cabinet time and time again. I love Tupperware, too buddy.  Tupperware and nesting bowls.

6. Though I don't always want to admit it, I do find your sense of humor quite funny, especially when you toss food over your shoulder when you're done with it or when you dribble milk out of your mouth all over yourself and the floor.  Mazu, the dog, is thankful for this as well.  He loves milk - on the floor, in the carpet, on your face.

7. I love that you're already reaching for the stars, by climbing up the stairs every opportunity you get. 

8. Your ability to function on such a small amount of sleep makes college students envious.  Naps are for babies!

9. I'm thankful that we, along with our friends and family, are financially able to purchase you so many nice toys.  I will be more thankful when you actually pay attention to them, instead of wanting to play with every other thing that is NOT in fact a toy for you.

10. I absolutely love that you're so curious and that you never stop moving for even a minute (like a mommy bathroom break - see #s 1, 2, 7 and 9).  I love that you're always learning and growing and so, so busy. 

But mostly, though, in all seriousness, I am so thankful that I get to be at home with you and be your mom.  I'm thankful that I'm the one changing your diapers and I'm the one that's giving you an ice pack for that bloody lip from tripping and falling over, yet again.  I'm thankful for the smiles and the giggles, especially when you're cuddled up on the dog beds.  I'm even thankful for the complaining and the resistance because that shows that you're headstrong and have thoughts of your own even at this ripe old age of 13 months.  I'm thankful that you come over just to sit close to me, while sucking your thumb and rubbing my arm or leg.  Most days, I feel a little crazy and a little lost and wonder if I'm doing any of this right at all.  And as much as I feel like complaining some days, I'm also so very thankful.

Like White on Rice

So it's been an eventful week/weekend of the baby not sleeping.  It may be due to the pending arrival of his first tooth - on TOP!  So cute - he's going to look like a little hillbilly.  Mostly babies get two teeth on the bottom first, but not this guy.  And it is a good thing he's cute with all the middle of the night awakenings lately.  I'm still tired, in case anyone was wondering.  So tired.  It's official that I don't even remember the last time I wasn't at least a little bit tired.  Anyway, so you want to know what I've been eating?  It's been good, bad and ugly and coincidentally, that's a little bit how I feel as a result. 

Tuesday was pretty much a rock star day.  Even though I was tired, I can't believe I didn't want to brag about it right then and there!

8:00 am
Oatmeal - this must have been leftover baked oatmeal and we're counting it as the usual,
1 "always" carb
1 "thumbs up" protein
1 fruit
1 fat

11:45 am
Apple - 1 fruit
Peanut Butter - 1 Tablespoon - 1 fat

12:15 pm - leftover chicken pot pie
Crust - 2 "rarely" carbs
Chicken - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Vegetables - 1 veg
1/2 Plum - 1/2 fruit

3:30 pm
Whole Wheat Tortilla Chips - 1 serving - 1 "sometimes" carb
Guacamole - a small amount (but probably more than I realize since I didn't measure) - 1 (or so) fat

4:45 pm
String Cheese - 1 "thumbs up" protein

5:15 pm
Broccoli and Sweet Potatoes that the baby didn't want to eat - 2 veg

7:00 pm
Scrambled eggs with cheese - 3 "thumbs up" proteins
Whole Wheat English Muffin - 2 "always" carbs
Fruit - assorted cherries, grapes and blueberries - 1.5 fruits

Carbs: 6/6
Protein: 6/6
Fruit: 4/3
Fat: 3/3
Veg: 3/4.5

See, pretty rock star day, overall.

Wednesday wasn't bad.  I didn't get enough fats in that day.  I feel as though my body should have enough on reserve that I shouldn't have to eat it every day, but that would be directly disproving the book and I'm not trying to do anything crazy like that.  It's all about balance and in all likelihood, I did have those fats somewhere and just didn't know to count them.  Let's be honest.

7:50 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Banana - 1 fruit

10:55 am
Whole Wheat English Muffin - 2 "always" carbs
Peanut Butter - 1 Tablespoon - 1 fat
Apple - 1 fruit

12:30 pm - leftover chicken pot pie and some extra carrots
2 "rarely" carbs
1 "thumbs up" protein
2 veg

4:15 pm
String Cheese - 1 "thumbs up" protein

Still hungry.

4:45 pm
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

7:30 pm
Cheese and Crackers - I came down from putting the baby to bed and these were out on the counter - I can't resist cheese and crackers.
Crackers - 1 "rarely" carb, since they weren't whole wheat or anything like that
Cheese - 1 protein - I won't call it thumbs up because it wasn't low fat, which made it SO tasty.

I made dinner and it was gross.  This chicken was just way too easy.  I should have known.  It looked good and with a name like Baked Garlic Brown Sugar Chicken, I thought it would be delicious.

In addition to being gross, it also caked my casserole dish with char that took me basically the entire next day to get off. 

Then I made this zucchini, which had so much promise - it was from the same blog as the zucchini and corn side dish I made the other week that was so delicious, but it really didn't have much flavor.  I choked it down to get in my veggie count but will not be making it again.  Don't be fooled by how yummy it looks.


Luckily, I had picked up some baklava and we had that for dessert.  You may notice that we have baklava a lot.  Before this diet, we had been on a Mediterranean diet for a hot minute and it boasted about baklava being an ok dessert of choice - and our local international farmer's market has some very good baklava.  Excellent.  I tried to eat most of my chicken just to get my protein for the day but just couldn't quite do it.

So for dinner,
Chicken - 1.5 "thumbs up" proteins
Zucchini - 2 veg
Baklava - 1 "rarely" carb

Which brings our daily totals to,
Carbs: 7/6
Protein: 5.5/6
Fruit: 2/3
Fat: 1/3 - probably one more because of the baklava and the nuts
Veg: 4/4.5 - we're getting there!

Thursday, yikes, I didn't even tally up totals for this day.  It must have been bad.  We ordered in sushi for dinner.  I didn't ask if they could use brown rice, but should have.  Maybe next time.

That's where I fell off the wagon, like white on rice, literally.

7:45 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

9:45 am
String Cheese - 1 "thumbs up" protein

11:45 am
Whole Wheat English Muffin - 2 "always" carbs
Peanut Butter - 1 Tablespoon - 1 fat
Banana - 1 fruit

2:30 pm
Cheerios - dry, 1 cup-ish.  I was trying to share with the baby and messiness ensued but I did get a little snack at least. - 1 "always" carb

3:50 pm
Apricots - 4 - 1 fruit

5:00 pm
Grapes - 1 cup-ish - 1 fruit

8:00 pm
Pot Stickers - steamed - 1/2 an order (3)
I'm guessing 1 "rarely" carb and 1/2 protein for whatever meat is inside (I'm honestly not sure, but it's delicious, which probably makes it a perilous protein)

Sushi galore with shrimp, tuna, avocado, cucumbers (but no cream cheese, which I LOVE in sushi)
2 "rarely" carbs
1 fat
1 veg
2 "thumbs up" proteins

I probably didn't tally the sushi correctly because as a whole, aside from the lack of veggies, yet again, the scoreboard doesn't look terrible.

Carbs: 6/6
Protein: 4.5/6
Fruit: 3/3
Fat: 2/3
Veg: 1/4.5

I got things back under control on Friday, partly because I knew we were having calzones for dinner.  This day, I tried a new version of that squash and corn side dish more specifically geared towards the baby.  He loved it, but I think it still needs some tweaking.  I won't post it for you until it's better!

8:30 am - this probably means the baby didn't sleep all night since I'm usually breaking the fast before 8 am.  Awesome way to start the day!
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

11:25 am
Oatmeal - 1/2 cup - 1 "always" carb
Milk - 3/4 cup - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Blueberries - 1/2 cup - 1 fruit
Walnuts - 2 Tablespoons - 1 fat

1:30 pm
Squash and Zucchini - 2 cups - 2 veg
Grilled Cheese Crust - we're eating with a baby here - 1 "always" carb?
String Cheese (plus whatever small amount of cheese was melted in the crust) - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Banana - 1 fruit
Peanut Butter - 1 Tablespoon - 1 fat

The vegetables are cooked in some olive oil so I'm guessing they should also be counted as at least 1/2 a fat serving.

4:30 pm
Peach - 1 fruit

Still hungry

4:45 pm
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

9:00 pm dinner - this was a stressful evening - I went to get my hair done and daddy was in charge of putting the baby to bed and tried with all his might but couldn't get him to take a bottle so he was awake and waiting for me when I got home at 8:45 so I could nurse him and put him to bed.

Calzone Crust - 4 "rarely" carbs - not even a little bit whole wheat
Cheese - I wasn't there to measure but I'm guessing 2 "thumbs up" proteins
Mushroom, Onion, Sauce - 1 veg
Pepperoni - this isn't even listed in the index of my book - 1 fat?
Pesto - 1 fat

But it sure was tasty.  Love a good calzone.

Carbs: 7/6
Protein: 5/6
Fruit: 3/3
Fat: 4.5/3
Veg: 3/4.5

On to the rest of the weekend.

Saturday wasn't a bad day but I ended up short on carbs, fruit and veggies, of course.

7:30 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

9:30 am - we actually put the baby in the stroller and walked down the street to the donut shop - it was about 1.35 miles total, which I know doesn't even begin to counteract the donut but we'll just call it 2 "rarely" carbs

12:00 pm
Oatmeal - 1/2 cup - 1 "always" carb
Milk - 3/4 cup - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Strawberries - 1/2 cup sliced - 1 fruit
Walnuts - 2 Tablespoons - 1 fat

We went to Gymboree and then afterwards we were all really hungry so we went by the Whole Foods to pick up some late lunch.

2:00 pm
Salmon - so sad, this salmon was tough and gross - I ate as much as I could, which wasn't much - 1/2 protein
Green Beans - 1 veg
Spicy Cheddar Mashed Sweet Potatoes - 1 veg - maybe 1 protein as well?  This is what happens when you don't make your own food.

5:00 pm - I had a total hankering for some deviled eggs and my super sweet husband obliged.  Not a terrible choice but I ate too many - I total it up to 3 total eggs - 3 proteins and probably 1 fat

8:00 pm - we ordered in Mediterranean
Hummus - around 3 Tablespoons worth - 1 fat
Chicken - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Baba Ganoush - 1 veg?
Pita - 1 "rarely" carb
French Fries - oops, there those are again - 1 veg, 1 fat?

Carbs: 4/6
Protein: 7/6
Fruit: 1/3
Fat: 3/3
Veg: 3/4.5

Probably shouldn't have had those deviled eggs.

French Fries?

Ok, so here's the thing.  I get it, you're not supposed to eat French Fries, like, ever, or any fried food for that matter. You're probably also not supposed to eat cake or cupcakes or things like that.  Ok, well noted.  But since this is a lifestyle and not a "diet", chances are, I'm going to eat those things from time to time, even though I know they'll go straight to my ass and even though I'll probably even feel bad about it afterwards.  That sounds torturous, but don't act like you don't do it.

All in all, Friday was a pretty good day, bordering on great, even.  Part of my hesitation to call it great is the fact that I had some sweet potato fries.  I mean, surely they still count as a vegetable, right?  I looked up French Fries in the book just so that I could have some frame of reference and they were discussed on one solitary page and basically what was said about them was that if you eat them, your sex life may suffer.  Now I'm surely not about to go off on a tangent over sex versus French Fries or anything crazy like that, but I really do want to know, if I do happen to eat them, how do I count them?  I chose to count them as 2 vegetables and 1 fat.

Oh, yes, I'm looking at my notes and that's the other reason Friday wasn't great - my husband was working from home and declared it Donut Friday and I had a donut for breakfast, ha.  Oops.  But donuts are listed in the book - maybe not cream filled but still.

7:45 am
Donut (from the best, Dandy Donuts) - 2 "rarely" carbs

10:00 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

11:30 am
Plum - 1 fruit

1:00 pm
Zucchini, Squash and Corn (same recipe from the other day, but I added squash and left out cilantro -
If we're being honest, I left out cilantro partly because I had thrown out what we had the night before and partly because I'm lazy and hate dicing up fresh herbs - ugh, hate it.  I was on a mission to make some veggies that the baby would like, and he really did like this dish but I think next time I'll remove the skins and leave out the corn for him - be on the lookout for that modified recipe.  I digress, but these veggies were still damn delicious as they are described, even minus the cilantro) - 2 cups - 2 veggie servings
Whole Wheat Tortilla - 1 "always" carb
Mozzarella Cheese - 1/4 cup - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Chicken Nuggets - 2 (3 fingers worth) - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Cherries - 1 cup - 1 fruit

5:00 pm
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

8:00 pm
Burger - Beef Patty - 2 "thumbs up" proteins
Bun - 2 "sometimes" carbs
Cheese - 1 protein - I honestly don't know if this is thumbs up or down or otherwise - probably should have skipped it
Lettuce, Tomato - negligible
Sweet Potato Fries - 2 veggies, 1 fat
Banana - 1 fruit
Peanut Butter - 1 Tablespoon - 1 fat

Carbs: 6/6
Protein: 6/6
Fruit: 3/3
Fat: 2/3
Veg: 4/4.5

Saturday was a bit of a mess, partly because we ended up in the ER when my husband cut his finger on our food processor blade when he was putting it away.  It was nothing glamorous or intense, he just dropped it and it landed on his knuckle and there was quite a bit of blood so we made a visit to the ER for some dermabond.  All is ok, he's not going to lose a finger or anything, but I've been on kitchen duty ever since, which, if you know my husband, is killing him! We are both ready to have him back to normal.

Anyhow, I didn't spread my food out very well and also didn't get enough veggies, or fruit for that matter.  Most days, I feel like if I could eat more fruit servings instead of vegetables, I could totally do that, but neither was close this day.  I blame the ER.

7:45 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

12:00 pm
Whole Wheat Tortilla - 1 "always" carb
Mozzarella Cheese - 1/4 cup - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Chicken Nuggets - 2 (3 fingers worth) - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Fruit - cherries and grapes- 1 fruit
Broccoli (the baby refused to eat it) - 1 veg

3:30 pm
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

Dinner was homemade pizza - this really made my husband crazy because this is his thing and I had to do it for him.  I would like the record to show that it was still delicious.
Crust - 5 "sometimes/rarely" carbs
Pesto - 2 fats
Mozzarella Cheese - 3 proteins
Parmesan Cheese - 1 protein

Carbs: 7/6
Protein: 7/6
Fruit: 1/3
Fat: 2/3
Veg: 1/4.5

Ah, Sunday.  I took this day to make some practice cupcakes for the baby's birthday that's coming up in September.  I've been trying to make healthier options than the typical cupcake.  The first version was pretty gross.  This last one was palatable - so much so that I had to try 3 to see if they were ok.  Hmm.  If you're not supposed to have one cupcake, surely you're definitely not supposed to have 3.  And again, how do I count these?  I guess carbs.

7:45 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

9:00 am
Baked Oatmeal
1 "always" carb
1 fruit
1 "thumbs up" protein
1 fat

12:00 pm
Sweet Potatoes - the baby was fighting naps and actually fell asleep in the high chair before he got a chance to legitimately ignore his sweet potatoes - so I ate them while I was waiting for my husband to bring home Chipotle (my first Chipotle experience, EVER).

1:00 pm Chicken Tacos
Flour Tortilla (we requested whole wheat but to no avail) - 2 "rarely" carbs
Chicken - 2 "thumbs up" proteins
Lettuce, tomato, etc - 1 veg
Guacamole - 1 fat

Cupcake(s) x 3 - yikes - 3 "rarely/never ever" carbs

6:00 pm
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

8:00 pm
Salmon - again, we love this recipe using salmon from the local Farmer's Market -2 "thumbs up" proteins
Broccoli - a lot - 1.5 veg

Carbs: 7/6
Protein: 6/6
Fruit: 1/3 - probably should have had some fruit instead of that last cupcake - or those last 2 cupcakes
Fat: 2/3 - buttercream icing probably takes this up to 5 - just now thought of that.
Veg: 3.5/4.5

I don't know what happened on Monday.  It was only yesterday but I honestly don't remember how I felt and what caused me to eat what I did.  Part of the problem is that we had leftover pizza.  God, I love pizza.  And we had leftover baked oatmeal - which, isn't bad but also isn't as good as the good old "regular" oatmeal.

I'm just going to give it to you straight.

7:45 am
Oatmeal
1 "always" carb
1 fruit
1 "thumbs up" protein
1 fat

10:45 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

12:00 pm
Pizza - now I'm starting to remember.  The baby didn't want to nap - we met some friends at the park in the morning and he might have taken a 15 minute snooze and then he didn't want to go back down so I had put him in his crib and he screamed while I "enjoyed" my pizza and then I got him up and we played for 45 more minutes until we tried again.  I finally had to rock him to sleep around 1:25.  Exhausting.
3 "rarely" carbs
1 fat
1 "thumbs up" protein

2:40 pm
Peach - 1 fruit
Cupcake - oops - 1 "rarely" carb, 1 fat
Nature Valley Pumpkin Flax bar - so yummy, I think the tiredness made me do it - 2 carbs?

5:30 pm
Carrots - 3 oz - 1 veg
Peanut Butter - 2 Tablespoons - 2 fats

8:00 pm
Chicken Pot Pie - this Pilsbury recipe actually isn't so bad - at least I don't think so
Crust - 2 "rarely" carbs
Chicken - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Corn, Green Beans, Peas and Carrots - 1 veg

Ice Cream - I just had to do it - 1/2 cup maybe? - 1 "probably shouldn't" protein

Carbs: 9/6 - eesh
Protein: 5/6
Fruit: 2/3
Fat: 5/3
Veg: 2/4.5

I mean, I don't know what else to say about that.  That's all. 

I don't want to talk about today, yet.  I'm tired.  Say you have this baby that used to take two naps a day.  And say the combined time of those naps was around 2.5 hours.  When said baby goes from two naps to one, one would only assume that this single nap would be around the same time as the combined naps, right?  Right?  Riiight.  Or, said nap time decreases to around 1.5 hours total.  That's what we're dealing with right now - more awake time, later naps, nap rebellion, sheer exhaustion.  I'll come back later and link up a few more things - just wanted to let you all know I hadn't fallen completely off the wagon.

2 inches lost!

That's technically since April, but either way, I consider it a win.  I don't care if it took 6 months - progress is progress. If I could add exercise into my current routine, other than standing most of the day and lugging around an 18 lb weight a good portion of the time, I think I'd be in really good shape. Baby steps.  Literally.

So Monday was great, naturally, since I learned that I was 2" leaner and food wise, it wasn't too bad either.

Baked Oatmeal for breakfast at 7:45.
1 "always" carb
1 fruit
1 "thumbs up" protein
1 fat

11 am
Greek Yogurt - 1 "thumbs up" protein

1 pm
Whole Wheat Tortilla - 1 "always" carb
Mozzarella Cheese - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Chicken Nuggets - 1 "thumbs up" protein
Zucchini and Corn (leftovers from the night before, still delicious) - 1 veg
Peach - 1 fruit

3 pm
Cheerios - 1 cup - 1 "always" carb
Almonds - 11 - 1 fat

5 pm
Banana - 1 fruit
Popcorn - 3 cups - 1 "always" carb

8 pm - Dinner was salmon again.  As a new fish eater, I've been sticking with what I know and with a name like cheesy baked salmon, how can one go wrong?!

This salmon was very good.  We have it on the list to put into rotation - the only thing we'd do differently is to dice the onion instead of slicing it in thin rings.  We found that when taking a bite, a ring of onion would pull off cheese from other parts of the fish.  I like uniform cheese distribution.

(click picture for recipe)


We had this salmon and some green beans.  Since the salmon had mayo (we used the olive oil version) and cheese, I counted it as 3 proteins and 1 fat (2 portions of salmon plus the cheese counted as the 3 proteins).  Green beans counted as 1 vegetable and then last night was our last night of pie so one fat.  I was still craving some sugar so I also had some graham crackers at 1 carb.  They're probably not an "always" carb but it is what it is.  I may or may not have dipped them in cool whip I had left over from making the pie.

So for daily totals:
Carbs: 5/6
Protein: 7/6
Fruit: 3/3
Fat: 4/3
Veg: 2/4.5

Still not terrible, but for whatever reason I am finding that I have a craving for some sweets.  It seems doubtful to me that it's because my carb intake is low but who knows.  I don't have any type of degree in nutrition.  I think I may re-read the book this week to get a reminder on what kind of side effects the different twin trials had.  If I'm having cravings, surely I'm lacking something somewhere, right?

The baby has been making me crazy.  He has not been ready to sleep for his 9 am naptime so for the last several days, I've been waiting until 11 to put him down.  Let's just say we're still working out the kinks.

Sunday, he slept for about an hour and a half starting at 11 so I figured he'd probably need another nap at some point and he fell asleep around 3 after nursing.  He slept for about 40 minutes and then had a hard time getting to sleep that night.  Yesterday, he slept for an hour and 15 minutes when I put him down at 11 and then slept for approximately 11 minutes (yes, 11 - there's really not much you can get done in 11 minutes) after he nursed around 3.  He went to bed without incident but was wide awake at 11:30 and needed nursing back to sleep.  Today, it's noon, and it looks as though he's just gotten himself back to sleep.  He was looking extra sleepy this morning so I nursed him at 10:30 and he fell asleep after that, around 10:50 or so.  He woke up, 52 minutes in (yes, I time all his naps) and it took him a few minutes but by golly, it does look like he's sleeping again.  Thank goodness.  I've been doing so much logging for the baby and now for my food that sometimes when I get done using the bathroom I look around for a minute to see if I should be recording that somewhere.  My husband thinks I need to get some more adult friends and get out of the house more.  Probably not a bad idea.